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(Attached picture is of our hike around the Neuschwanstein castle in
Southern Germany a few weeks ago.)
11:11 Two Years Later...
Two years ago today I left Maui for Bangkok. One year ago today I
wrote you a travel update from India. Today I write to you from my
warm flat in Berlin. It’s overcast and fairly cold outside. (I
can tell how much I’ve changed already, because now when it’s 8
degrees Celsius I find it only ´fairly cold`.)
Oh, how much has changed and passed before my eyes in but two
years! I have been in 13 countries and a myriad of temperatures
and social classes. My mind whizzes with a blur of memories that
neither camera nor word could encapsulate…yet I try anyhow.
Almost a year in Thailand, studying yoga with a Romanian master,
riding on top of a bull’s horn, surviving India, whizzing around
polluted Asia in tuk-tuks, falling in love in crazy third world
scenes, arriving in one of the world’s most ordered, efficient and
cerebral countries, Liechtenstein, Austria, Switzerland, laying
down my backpack and making a new home…doing it all and making it
out alive, sometimes even with grace!
What have I learned in two years away from home? Number one is
that I have learned where my home is. Physically, I am more sure
than ever that my home is Kauai. Considering how long it’s taking
me to get back, this may come as a surprise. Rest assured (to all
of those in Hawaii) I will come home. I don’t know exactly when,
but I will come home. I thought that maybe traveling around this
planet I might find a place that I liked as much. I can say
without any hesitancy that there is no place I have found like
Hawaii. The overwhelming physical beauty of the islands aside (and
that is a HUGE thing to put aside!) Hawaii is simply home to the
most beautiful and conscious community I have seen, ever.
Since I have not been ´home´ in two years I have had to find home
within myself, within my heart, and with Joel. In this sense, I am
not so lonely. However, loneliness continues to be one of the
hardest things about being away. I like to be independent and do
things with various friends. I don’t want to depend on Joel as
being my only playmate. Sometimes it is so exciting to be in a big
city with so many options of things to do! The culture, the
excitement, the variety … sometimes I wish that I had more than
only Joel, and one friend I knew from here before (who now doesn’t
even live in Berlin) to do something with. I thought if I just came
back to the West I would be able to make new friends, but
unfortunately I have not encountered Germans that are as open as I
remembered from when I was here 9 years ago. Generally I have
found that most Germans are either too busy to do anything, or
simply not desirous of starting a new friendship until they know
someone for a long time first.
On my end I find that, all of a sudden, I am also always busy, so
it's not like I have much time to chase after friends either. Life
as a free lance teacher is busy, tiring and time-consuming. So is
being a foreigner trying to figure things out, in any country. So
is not being able to read, understand or communicate freely in the
language of the country you reside in. The language issue requires
a lot more help from others to figure out even something simple.
Unfortunately that means that I am not able to do things as quickly
or independently as I would often like. Yet I am here now, and
Berlin has many good points.
Last week we ended up having a bit of time, so we actually went
out every night. We went to an awesome dance party at a local
spiritual center, a movie, a jazz festival, a cheesy Halloween
party, a short film festival, and a walk down a local street that’s
very interesting. The last street is actually so culturally
different to some parts of Berlin it could easily be called Little
Istanbul. (It has great pizza.) Berlin just has a never ending
list of interesting and cultural events. It’s exciting to be
surrounded by so much new and old culture.
Even with all of the difficulties of starting a life, home and new
career in a foreign country and even the cold weather taken into
account, I am still so grateful that I am here doing what I am
doing now, and not back in India! I thank Goddess for that often.
I am also immensely grateful for the nearly two years of time I
had for myself. Free from work, free from obligations, time to do
just what I wanted! Now after so much time, I am happy to work
again. It is rather balancing to be doing so many things again.
Speaking of balance, this is one other thing I have really learned
a lot about. I formerly conceived of balance as being a state that
one arrives at. I can now see clearly that balance, whether it be
within myself, my body, my spirituality or my relationships, is a
path. I now believe that balance is something I must be constantly
aware of, generally due to the lack of it, and I am no longer
striving for it as if once I attained it then my work is complete.
I guess you might say it’s kind of like cleaning the house, eh?
So where am I now? I am looking out my window at the extraordinary
event that they call ‘autumn’ (‘fall’ for those of us from the
States). The view out of my window is not really so different from
the rest of Berlin, yet it has a range of colors that is so deep
and filling. I do not tire of the gorgeous colors flying from the
trees on their last journey. There is an excitement in the air
whenever the wind breaths. It’s like God is somehow making up for
the less than desirable weather She gave this part of the world
with enough colors to keep my heart warm. There are not merely
colors in the trees and thickly covering the streets. There are
colorful leaves flying in the air - above, around and in-between.
It is autumn, and it is beautiful!
I will leave you for now. I hope to send more pictures soon. If
anyone knows how I can attach pictures to an email, then go
backwards to send the same email again (to a new address) withOUT
having to reattach the pictures again, then I will send more
pictures. As of now I have to attach each picture to each email I
send out individually, or it does not send it. I’d love input on
this.
Enjoy autumn, wherever you are, and I send a big hug full
of lots of excited colorful autumn leaves!
Tschüss,
Timory
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